by Erin

You have a major leak in your home. While this might immediately conjure up images of your ceiling caving in, you can put that aside because this leak does not involve water.  The leak is the flow of information out of your home and into the hands of teachers and friends via your adorable kids.   Possibly this leak even extends to “acquaintances” such as parents of the friend your child has a playdate with.  They have met you at school dropoff, but really know very little about you, except for the important fact (shared by little Johnny) that your husband sleeps naked.

Here we are, worried about our “loss of privacy” due to people oversharing about us on Facebook or posting an unflattering photo somewhere.  I’m starting to think this might pale in comparison with the info that flows from the mouths of our babes.  How easy it is for them to mention exactly how messy their house is or how mom backed her car into the neighbor’s tree or how much dad farts.   Or worse…

Sometimes the leak even gets published into school artwork. This nice note that my son wrote as a first grade project for Mothers’ Day reads: “My mom’s favorite thing to do is go to parties! She loves to sleep!”  Great.  After 7 years of blood, sweat and tears (not to mention sleepless nights and a teensy bit of stress), I’m glad he could highlight for the teachers the most important and best things about me as a mom – that I love to party and sleep.   Really?

My personal favorite is this poem, where my son had to make up one line for each of the letters in W-I-N-T-E-R and type them up during computer class.  The first line speaks for itself.

W ine is good for parents

I love snow

N uts are frozen

T he bears hibernate

E ars turn pink

R ats scuttle to dry places

And now, I need to go take a nap.  Or go to a party.   Or have a glass of wine.   After all, this is my life… according to my son (and now, apparently, to his teachers as well).

Read the stories (or add your own)!

You might like:

• Do you secretly throw out some of your kids’ artwork?
• Do your parents or husband sometimes forget that things said in front of the kids might be repeated elsewhere?
• Have you ever reminded your child not to share a private “family thing” with others?

P.S. If you want to see some good homework gone hilariously bad, check out #3 here.